I find this to be quite amusing. Additionally, it prompted me to think a bit about my sexuality/orientation. Hm.
And, yes, this is definitely supposed to be a response to the experience of many gays and lesbians as people start to realize their orientation.
Heterosexual Questionnaire
1. What do you think caused your heterosexuality?
2. When and how did you decide that you were a heterosexual?
3. Is it possible that your heterosexuality is just a phase that you may grow out of?
4. Is it possible your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic fear of others of the same sex?
5. If you’ve never slept with a person of the same sex, is it possible that all you need is a good gay or lesbian lover?
6. To whom have you disclosed your heterosexual tendencies? How did he or she react?
7. Why do you heterosexuals feel compelled to seduce others into your life-style?
8. Why do you insist on flaunting your heterosexuality? Why can’t you just be what you are and keep quiet about it?
9. Would you want your children to be heterosexual knowing the problems that they’d face?
10. A disproportionate majority of child molesters are heterosexual. Do you consider it safe to expose your children to heterosexual teachers?
11. With all the societal support marriage receives, the divorce rate is spiraling. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals?
12. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex?
13. Considering the menace of overpopulation, how could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual like you?
14. Could you trust a heterosexual therapist to be objective? Don’t you fear (s)he might be inclined to influence you in the direction of her/his own feelings?
15. How can you become a whole person if you limit yourself to compulsive, exclusive heterosexuality, and fail to develop your natural healthy homosexual potential?
16. There seem to be very few happy heterosexuals. Techniques have been developed that might enable you to change if you really want to. Have you considered trying aversion therapy?
Reprinted from “Are You Still My Mother” by Gloria Guss Back. Warner Books, 1985. Questionnaire attributed to Martin Rochlin, Ph.D., West Hollywood, CA.
The 'trident' theory of relativity says if you are not happy here, go over there. If that doesn't work try somewhere else. I suppose if the grass is truly greener somewhere else, it means that is has rained and sunshined intermittently somewhere enough to grow green grass. At least over there! What can it all mean. Well, I suppose, if one needs to be near green grass, it is self-fullfilling. If one wishes to experience green grass, one must sometimes look for it elsewhere. Plus green grass takes more than wishing and hoping so monitor the rainfall and sunshine to determine where green grass might best be found or grow.
Thank you and good nite.
Mmm.. I especially agree about how green grass takes more than wishing and hoping (I am learning about all of that with my aloe plant ;) Mostly with this questionnaire, I do not find myself wondering about why people seek choices other than my own, but how we as a culture can be so aggressive and unforgiving towards them.
What the? Where are all the funny pea comics? I must be on the wrong blog.
They have been replaced by the 'you pee funny' jokes.
Just kidding! Just kidding! Really!
We had an aloe plant once that became a member of the family. It was large enough to find uncles and aunts amongst its branches and boughs. It cured many a burn from fire or sun and eased many rashes and soothed a bunch of scrapes. 'Aloe' is more than a French phone conversational start.
I believe my effective interpersonal conversation manual would say we must be empathic in our conversations but sympathetic to ourselves. That all meaning is within us by ourselves although others contribute to our perceived categories of meaning. I have learned a bit of this in my healthcare empathic caregiving course. It means I am in charge of my emotions and others are always having experiences that change their inner meanings and stereotyping. I cannot control them. I can only control myself. Thus it all means don't worry what others think or feel. Just respond to them with understandinng and empathy. It diffuses almost all differences peaceably. Easier said than done. And saying it ain't easy.
I lauged out loud when I read number ten.
That one had our class reacting, too, especially because one of the students works for a daycare system. She talked about how parents will reliably refuse to allow their children to be in the class room of a male kindergarten teacher. Is this really a big issue, and what effect does it have on our educators?