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I have something amazing to tell you!

I'm Alive! Wow! I don't know what else to say.

When I was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer back in October, I looked on the internet once and was so terrified of what I read on the first site that I vowed not to do that again. Then I had surgery, chemo and radiation. I was too exhausted from all that to go trolling for info. And too frightened, too. Frightened of the disease, the diagnosis, the prognosis.

After receiving the news that my first scan was good, I decided to look to see . . . well, to see more. I was really trying to predict the chance of having a recurrance because I was afraid to hope. The more I read, the more amazed I became. The median life expectancy for pancreatic cancer patients is only 6 months. And here I have made it to 9 months! (Did I say Wow!?!???) Included in that statistic are all the stages of cancer. That means even Stages I and II. Stage III is usually considered non-resectable, yet I had a doctor who took the risk and did it anyway. Why was it a risk? Well, there was a very good that I wouldn't survive the surgery. (I sort of didn't really 'hear' that when I talked to the surgeon. Selective hearing!) In other words, it is really sort of miraculous that I am still alive. I find it nothing short of amazing!
WOW!

Comments

YAY!!! And yeah, not only did you not 'hear' that part, you sure as heck didn't 'repeat' that part! (ahem, neither did Gloria, ahem). Well, I am very glad that I didn't have to learn about that the hard way.

I can't wait until your birthday - what a celebration!!!

Well, to tell you the truth, I'm not absolutety sure Dr. Henderson mentioned it, other than to mention that it can be a side effect of any surgery.

Hahahahaaa! I have purple comments! lol Wow! How cool! And I even know how it happened. Watch, I can change the color any time I want.

Hahahahaaa! I have purple comments! lol Wow! How cool! And I even know how it happened. Watch, I can change the color any time I want.

(Well, okay, so I can't.)

This is still a wonderful existence and i'm glad your are still here with me for a long time to come....

Hey, Maman! You beat the odds to a pulp - which is awesome, but I knew you'd do it. Mind you, you gave us a run for our money in the middle bit, but that's okay, because you're on the safe part of the tail now.

I love you lots and lots!

And, Maman, do you remember that Nathan and I were a little angry that you told us not to come home until the week after the surgery? Just now, I took a really deep breathe and tried to calm that feeling that you get when you're on the highway and just nearly miss being crushed by a semi hauling enormously oversized machinery for the manufacture of Q-tips.

I have to say how so very sorry I am that I put you off. I also need to apologize to Nathan and Mara for telling them not to come home for Uncle Philippe's funeral. I think it all stems from a) underestimating how serious my surgery was going to be and b) not wanting to be a 'bother', c) thinking I knew what was best for you. I just had no idea. I'm sorry that I told you (Mensch) not to come home for the surgery at all. If you wanted and needed to be there, that should have been enough. You had the right to be there. Frankly, I had no right to make this decision for you. (But I also didn't want to interrupt your schooling. I think I thought you would a) miss time and b) be so worried that you would lose focus. Y'all know schooling is very important in my world!)

I had that same feeling (just avoiding a fatal accident) when looking back on my illness.

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