For Crying Out Loud

Now, see, that was the stuff you weren't supposed to be reading, remember? The deal was that I pre-read any material that was to be conveyed to you. . . . Geesh, you sick people.

Mark and Ingrida and I had a lovely day going to the farmers' market and then onto a French market - we bought tons of fresh fruit and veggies, pain au chocolat, fresh bread, cheese and saucisson, went to the Meadows, plopped down and (with a very small pocket knife) proceeded to have a delicious lunch. We came back to the flat, slept, read, did mud masks and are now preparing for a birthday party! (Nathan's been helping with the party prep all day). I'm sure you'll hear more about the French market when Nathan and Ingrida visit, so I won't tell you any more about it now!

Oh, I must admit, I've been in love with Edinburgh for a while and I am SOOO enjoying my time here. Not even Mark's trip to the hospital could bring us down! The weather is perfect (as opposed to Haifa's super-muggy, super-sunny, probably hamsim-y {dust in the air}, vaguely edgy climate!), totally mellow, lots of beautiful green grass to walk on and pretty flowers and trees to look at, books to read, and Nathan and Ingrida to spoil us . . . ah, just what a vacation should be! Please do spoil them too - on our behalf. :-) (the beach is a must!)

well now, wasn't that a damned cheerful blog? Still, I know we are not elated as one might expect when given a clean Cat scan result after the past 8 months we've had to endure. Percentages are simple statistics that apply to masses of data and not necessarily masses of tissue. I know that for those in which the therapy works it is close to 100 percent successful. I read too....

Sorry, I didn't mean to depress anyone. That was not the point. At first, I couldn't read websites like this; they were too depressing. But as I gradually came to terms with my cancer, I actually find it interesting and even useful. I came to appreciate my outlook when I thought death was immenent (sp?). I was more accepting and savored each moment more. As soon as I got the clean scan info, I started to shift back to my old, cranky ways. And I also think it is important to not let our expectations shift to "Mamma is okay and will live long and prosporous", only to be really shocked should I actually die of this. Daddy is right, too, though. Statistics are masses of data and for those for whom the treatment is effective, it is 100% successful. So I haven't given up hope, but I try to be grounded in reality.

Wow! That's kind of fascinating. I think, however, that it's worth noting that any mortality information that you get is going to be at least a few years out of date. The people who have died from this had to undergo operations that were older and based on less knowledge. Cancer is possibly one of the most researched diseases in the world, large gains in knowledge are being constantly made and the efficacy of treatments is usually on the rise.

Thanks for the optimism. I am always positive, but I have to remember to stay hopeful.

I would like to support Mendon's comments by stating that the studies done to get the information you quoted are 7-10 years old as indicated in the source. Rest assured that we will not be shocked if your health takes a turn for the worse. We will, however, rejoice that you are alive and well now.

And that is what I am trying to do, too. Sometimes I forget.

I went back and checked the sources. The one I found (http://www.cancer.org/downloads/STT/CAFF2006PWSecured.pdf) is from 2006. It's the first one in the list. Still has a survival rate of 4%. Sorry.

It's from 1997. The number following the sentence corresponds to the information.

Right, I am referring to number one on their list. They didn't site it, but the data in is still good, relevant, etc.

Okay, let's think this through. (I think this is what y'all have been trying to tell me.) By necessity, five year survival statistics only can involve people diagnosed and treated five years ago. Okay, okay, I finally get it.

I just came from seeing Dr. Henderson. He is moving away from performing surgery and more into administrative duties. I talked to him. What he said that the longer I survive, the more likely I will survive. He was pleased with my scan and my progress and will see me again (actually, Conrad Smphendorfer will see me again) in another year.

All's well that wends well.....or is it ends well? I see! Bother that cat!

Okay, I feel a little like I'm intruding here because all the posts are from your immediate family. If I am, I'm really sorry, but I wanted to say of couple of things and I've never been exactly shy. So...

First, I want to congratulate you on a clean scan and tell you how happy I am that you're doing well. I understand that there is still a great deal that concerns you and that anything is possible, but I'm so glad that you are well TODAY.

Second, Sadie and Josh and I have been filling a number of our Saturdays with picnics in the park or time at the beach. If you ever have the urge to hang out with a precocious three-year-old and her neurotic parents (and who doesn't?), there's always room for one or two more.

Third, you so totally rock! Sure, it's not the most eloquent or educated thing to say, but it is so completely true.

Maman & Papa, order: take Tricia up on her picnic/beach time, please?! You know, as my stand-in :-)

Thanks for finding me, T. Erm, Maman, would you call her and give me my email address? Oh, yeah, and since you're calling her you can plan the next picnic :-)

Love to everyone!