For Crying Out Loud

I can't decide if you all are sick of my mediocore photos or not, so I will keep posting them for a while yet. Everyone else (really, Mensch and Kristen) are still asleep and Daddy is out in the yard studying for his certification test (Next Wednesday!) so I have a few minutes. Here goes. I think I still have some more in the camera, but I have misplaced my card reader. It seem so much easier to use than plugging the camera into the computer. But I took it to work and didn't put it right away when I got home. My bad.

There was another couple there who had the same digital camera as I did. They asked me to take their photo for their annual newsletter. I did, and because I am who I am, I took three shots with varying amounts of background and close/not so close-up. They were so impressed (really!) with the results that they kept asking me to take their photo, and out of politeness, offered to take ours in return. As a result, we have a fair amount of photos of the two of us posed in front of scenic sights. This is one of them.

And this is another one. I think I may have already posted several of the others.
At first I thought it was kind of silly, but then I was glad to have them. So often, it seems that I go on trips and take semi-pathetic snap shots of the scenery, then get home and can't remember what the picture is of and what it is not doing justice to and wish I had photos of the people I was with.

Okay, this is shamelessly posed. I admit it. This was at the North Rim. In the lodge there, is this bronze statue of a burro. They were released into the canyon and became ferral, and a problem. But this one burro, Brighty, was re-tamed and used to bring water from the bottom of the canyon daily. And it seems that bronze statues like this (there is a bronze statue of a wild boar in Florence, too and another one somewhere else I was) carry with them good luck, or happy returns, or some such ledgend with them if you rub them on their nose. See how bright his nose is?

While I have you here, I will talk about my health. On days that I feel well, which is most days, well, then I am well. I felt rather dismissed and sort of given-up-on by Dr. Pelley when I saw him in May, just before going on the trip. But as I thought about it, I began to see it as a reprive from doctors, needles, long faces and bad news. Yes, I saw my radiation oncologist, but she gave me good news -- I look good! and I feel pretty good most of the time. I really have been able to feel better during this time. And I really do have most of my energy. You can double check with Mensch and Kristen who are visiting this weekend. I suppose I want to reassure everyone, including myself, I suppose. But I really do feel well and am really learning to take one day at a time. We have all heard the phrase or advice to live in the moment, but I have been able to internalize it. I really know what that means, and it doesn't mean ignore the future.

When I was first recovering from surgery, I read that the patients who do best are those who feel that there is a lesson they have learned from their disease, almost that it is a gift. At the time I thought, 'yeah, right! Like that will ever happen. What could be the gift? All I feel is tremendous loss.' Yet, I have found at least three. One is the love of my family; nuclear, natal, and extended. Another is this live-in-the-moment thing. It amazes me the number of things that just are not important to me anymore, that I used to spend so much energy on. Third and perhaps the most important is the trust and bond I feel for/with Daddy.

Now that I have found gifts, does that mean that I will do well? Maybe, but mostly it means that I am happier with life. And happy to be living it.