The Operation Was a Success But the Patient Died
Or The Hazards of Gardening in Bi-Focals
Remember last week when I was going out to perform surgery on the zucchini plants?
Well, it was challenging. First of all, zucchini plants are slightly hairy. Not as prickly as say, raspberries, but more so than green beans. So here I am squatting among the zucchinis, sharp knife in hand, trying to maneuver around the large, hairy leaves of the plant, when all of a sudden the hairs on the leaves and stems come into alarmingly close focus, like eye of the needle close. Once I got over the shock of seeing the personality of the zucchini plant up close, I still had to perform the surgery. I lunged, knife poised! Slice! Gash! Okay, where is the culprit? Oh, you mean this quarter inch long thingie? That looks just like the pulp inside the plant? That is barely moving? Yep, that is what was eating my plants.
Next move is to mound dirt up around the cut and hope the plant grows some new roots. On some of the plants, I had to make serious gashes, basically separating the plant from the roots almost totally. Others I was able to cleanly cut the stem in half. I mounded the dirt up around the stem and watered well. And said a little prayer.
The next day at work, I discovered another vicissitude of gardening in bifocals. Merry said, “Have you been out in the sun? What is this white line on the back of your neck?” The chain that hangs my glasses around my neck left a white line in my farmer’s tan.
Well, you can guess the outcome. The seriously gashed plants were the ones that didn’t quite make it. The good news is that it has rained every day at least some since last Sunday when I performed the wormectomy, giving the plants lots of opportunity to establish roots. Several have survived well and a few others are still on the Guarded Condition list, but oveall the zucchinis have been saved.