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I don't want to be here.

I want to leave and I don't want to be around anyone I know.

Otherwise they'll just want to 'know what's wrong'. And I don't want to talk.

I just want it to all go away.

Is this what it was like, Maman, when you used to say "I've changed my name and I'm moving to Australia"?

4 Comments

Pretty much. Acutally, that often had to do with too many people asking me to do more than I thought I was capable of. What you are describing was when I said, "I want to go home."

mmmm, I love you, Mara. I remember being Gambia and having similar feelings (and Louhelen too). I just wanted to be somewhere else.

I hope that cloudy skies soon pass and the dismal rain turns into hot sweaty humidity.

:)

I don't want to hear anymore about hot and sweaty (or the monsoon that I just came from)! because I feel the same way. I just don't want to deal with people here anymore. I'm burned out and done and cranky. Not to distract attention and love away from your post, but it seems that "you're not alone" is comforting. Take care of yourself. Take a bath, take some chocolate, take time for music that makes you feel good. Could you even go out and go running or physically exhausting yourself another way? I'm sorry that you're feeling this way.

I am holding you in my e-arms and embracing your pain. I am e-kissing your boo-boo so it will feel bettor. I love you soooooo beeeeg! You certainly may write me at my private e-mail and talk if you wish. Blogging for the worl to see is probBLY NOT THE BEST IDEA RIGHT NOW.

LOVE DAGNABBIT,
PAPA

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This page contains a single entry by Mara published on June 19, 2005 3:14 PM.

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