When I was about eight and had recently begun to understand the concept of sex (i.e. that it was 1) necessary to have children, 2) it involved intimacy, and 3) people really really liked it) I stayed home from school, sick, and saw a syndicated rerun of the game show, "The Newly Wed Game." It looked like it was from the late 60's or 70's. The game entailed asking one newly-wed a question about their spouse, and then seeing if their answer matched up with their spouse's answer. From the episode that I watched, in my fevered strep-state, I can only remember one brief exchange from the show, it went like this:
Host: "Jane, how many times do you think your husband had sex before he met you?"
Jane:"Oh, I don't know, probably a thousand times."
It should be noted that I was entirely non-plussed by this statement. Being eight years old, I didn't really know how likely it was that anyone in their early twenties had had sex one thousand times before meeting their would be spouse. Later in the show the exchange went something like this.
Host:"Mark, earlier in the show we asked your wife this question. "How many times do you think your husband had sex before he met you?" What was her answer?"
Mark:"I don't know, I tried to come off as more experienced than I was. Maybe five or ten."
*Audience Laughs a little too hard*
*Mark gets a worried look on his face*
Host:Let's see what she said!
*Shows Clip*
Mark:(exasperated)"Honey, you were my first!"
Now, I don't remember ever using my fingers to do even the most complex mental math, but the image is too strong to resist. An eight year old Mendon wondering what it would take to repeat an action one thousand times. Pulling out my right hand I can see myself thinking, "There are 365 days in one year. If someone had sex once a day then two years would be 730 times and three years would have been 1095 times. So, I guess he would have had to have had sex once a day for almost three years (maybe taking Sundays off) to have sex one thousand times. I wonder if that is a lot?"
Posted by Mendon at April 8, 2006 1:08 PMYou know, Mendon, I never thought I'd ever encounter another human being who thought similarly to the way I do.
However, I do have to say that I did have to use my fingers in higher math (still do, although it's not working much in higher statistics courses)...
The other thought swimming in my head after reading this is "have you slept much yet?" ;)
1) Way for them to have an honest relationship. Sometimes I wonder where gameshows find the people that are on them, no matter if the show is from today or 30 years ago.
2) Complex mental math is not my forte. I love math and am very strong at it, but I was better at figuring out cool shortcuts using my calculator than doing things in my head. Next year Shane will start Algebra 2 and I'll have to pass on the TI-83, and that will be a sad day for me.
Posted by: Hayley at April 9, 2006 1:49 PMOnce, when I was young, I was sorting laundry in the basement with Mommy. Trying to show off something I'd learned at school, I said: "You know, if there was only one man, he could repopulate the earth, because he could get thousands of women pregnant."
Mommy looked startled and said: "Not in the same day!"
Posted by: Nathan Dornbrook at April 10, 2006 2:47 PM