Adjustment, Healing & Love
My parents are in Haifa! This is their first visit to the Holy Land, and it's a sneaking suspicion that they are in the process of some profoundly moving experiences. However, just my suspicion. Mostly because when I'm in that mode I neither realize I'm going through it nor do I want to talk about it.
On verra.
Violetta just left - this picture is from her farewell. I miss her, but I don't think I've really figured out she's gone yet. On the other hand, it was time for her to go, and I recognize that. Somehow, I think that if she hadn't left it would have been hard for me from the standpoint that if she couldn't leave, it was less likely that I would. I love this place, but I have other plans.... I'll be ready to go when it is my time.
Vi, I wish you all the best in the whole wide world, you know that, and nothing I could say could truly express my feelings for our relationship. I know it is one that will always be there, whether we're in constant contact or not.
The reason I feel this way is that we went through tests together. What this finally made me realize is that, although I may be reluctant, I am much more open to friends testing me than strangers, enemies, people I just don't like. Fortunately, they're open to being tested by me, too. I think the friends that I struggle with through a test, and come out together on the other side, are the ones that are most likely to last a lifetime. Perhaps it's because we've invested in each other; we worked on ourselves to be better friends to them. We're committed to each other. And they've watched us do it, so they appreciate our growth - and struggle. With strangers, even if they're right, I largely just write them off as nutcases and ignore them being mad or frustrated with me - or even if they give constructive criticism. I think "what do they know?" and forget about it. With a friend, it's like a grain of sand in the oyster - it grows, is irritating, I'd love to get over it, ignore it, etc., but really I just have to deal with it. And once I do, then good things happen.
I love figuring out a test. Of course, it doesn't stop happening, but hopefully in the future I will be better behaved :-)
Comments
Okay, I'm lazy: my parents are the ones in black.
Posted by: Mara | January 5, 2005 9:59 AM
I love this post.. it has so much truth to the way you describe a freindship and testing...
Posted by: sjona | January 5, 2005 8:14 PM
You said it! There's also something to be said for having gone through a test (or many) with a friend... they've seen you at your worst, and they still love you. That's pretty cool I think.
Hi to the folkses from me!
Posted by: krisia | January 7, 2005 11:51 PM
I love the way that both Mommy and Daddy wear those cords on their glasses! It looks great!
And check out the near-identical expressions they have on their faces!
What a great photo!
Posted by: Nathan Dornbrook | January 11, 2005 4:59 AM