I said, "V*****a," in class the other day, twice. The first time was in context; I was saying that birthing on one's back is pretty much the worst way to have a child because gravity puts so much stress on the v*****a. I chose v****a instead of perianal area because it is more understsandable and when a doctor performs an episiotomy the vagina suffers dearly, not just some abstract region that consists of two milimeters of flesh. The first time I mentioned it, a young lady told me that until I had a child I was not qualified to discuss birth or discuss v****as. In fact, I am not allowed to say v****a at all, regardless, apparently. I was a bit exasperated, citing that the v****a is the most common genderspecific organ (though I did not admit that it is tied with a lot of others for first place).
The second time I said it, I said it because I was telling the story of the first incident to a group of friends in one of my other classes. Of course, by then, I was wearing my "This is What a Feminist Looks Like" shirt. When the girl sitting next to me (much more politely) asked that I stop saying v****a because it made her uncomfortable, I said, "would you rather I use pussy or cunt?" Which resulted in a head swing from several people not in the conversation that people make when they hear or see something unbelievable and whatever they're doing becomes less important than paying attention to what just happened. She responded that she didn't like the way the word v****a sounds.
There are many derogatory terms for the v****a, as there are an unending plethora of euphamisms for the p***s (yes, El Guapo, I do know what a plethora is). However, both "p***y" and "c**t" are terms that are being reclaimed by feminists, which is why I used them. And, why not? Both c**t and p****y have a meaning that is expressed in there pronunciation that is positive and, potentially, reflective of the v****a. On the other hand, some people might complain that pronouncing "v****a" is something akin to a mood-killing mouthful of marbles (see The Vagina Monologues).
Furthermore, a professor of mine (for developmental psychology) referenced a book titled A Very Touching Book that was written to help children distinguish good touch, bad touch, and secret touch and understand how important it is to report physical and sexual_abuse. In the book, though, there is a section written to help educate children about various different body parts. It has both children and adults repeat words such as v****a, p***s, v***a, etc...
All this naming of parts got me to thinking about the names of our parts. For most organs in women there are corresponding organs in men. For example, women have o*****s and men have t******s. However, I realized that men are suffering from an existential crisis when it comes to the names of parts. Women have a name for the part of their body that is the source of much of their orgasm, the c******s. While, understandably, the p****s is a mutated and elongated c******s with a u*****a stuck inside, "p***s" is not an adequate name for the part that is the source of all of men's o*******c experience. When I realized that this part in me, essentially a dislocated c******s, was technically nameless, I experienced an epiphany about why there is such prevalent vandalism in men's bathrooms. There are billions of men searching for a word that they can use to describe their "o***** spot" or whatever you want to call it. It isn't the whole p***s, it's not just the head of the p***s. It's a specific spot on the p***s, just like the c******s is a specific spot on the vulva. Men want a name for that spot.
Kristen suggested that we call that spot the polonius. While I admire the humor, no man can remember four syllables. It would simply be shortened to "pole." Somehow, I don't think that that's going to fly.
Posted by Mendon at April 16, 2006 1:32 AMAgain, the things that cause you to expound on some ideas just amazes me.
On a side note, I do believe "I don't like the way 'v****a' sounds" is probably one of the stupidest things I've heard.
Although I have spent the last few years reminding my parents that the simple fact that I am in possession of a v****a does not mean I am handicapped by birth. Talk about looks :)
I love age gaps
Posted by: Janet at April 16, 2006 2:26 PMYou know this already, but it's worth mentioning again: I got such a kick out of Kristen using the word p***y! And you certainly shouldn't be banned from using the word v****a. Why should p***s be acceptable but not v****a?
I don't know why it is, but I completely understand the girl who said she doesn't like the way v****a sounds. I know a number of girls who feel the same. I'm pretty well on my way of getting over it (I think), but it certainly makes me wonder how the sound of the name of a part that should be one of the most treasured parts of the body only invokes disgust in so many girls. What is wrong with this picture? I think the word should be used more often in non-awkward-7th grade health class settings. That would help a lot in making v****a a more comfortable word.
Posted by: Hayley at April 16, 2006 10:09 PMIt's amazing how the "s*****l revolution" has had zero impact in certain areas such as word association. What a crock.
Posted by: Andrew at April 16, 2006 10:49 PMI am studying for healthcare and we have been encouraged to be sensitive to people on issues that are sensitive to them so as not to offend them thereby increasing heartrates or breathing rates or blood pressures. Being accurate or "crude" makes little difference if one is uncomfortable talking about private parts or sensuality. Anatomy is anatomy and its function is kind of rather obvious tho' the generations have proven ignorance of the topic regarding procreation or s*****l activity continues to abound. I was raised to not speak certain things in 'mixed' company and it was okay in men only or women only groups. Thus when we walk into a group of opposite gender the conversation dies. Some generations do better in being open than others. Since dictionaries will use common language for their 'in-print' meanings of words from now on, I suggest that what you say will become what words mean in the very near future. I am not sure that I will want to own a dictionary in ten years.
(that's supposed to be a haha joke). My family without a dictionary is like a day without sunshine. Which in my olde dictionary is the word 'dull'.
Someone should invent a product and call it Bajaina it would get a lot of free press, and attract a lot of customers when mentioned and recommended. lol.
Posted by: Rahmat at April 19, 2006 10:45 AMi'm so in love with the fact that you referenced El Guapo in this blog. that is one of my all time favorite movies and is the only reason i know what 'plethora' means.
as for the actual topic of the blog...perhaps next time you might say to the young lady that you are not comfortable with evesdropping (to be read with a touch of sarcasm). i find it utterly absurd to ban someone from using a word. words to not belong to specific groups of people and thus they can not be taken away.
on another side note, i too find it funny when kristen says 'p***y'..it makes me giggle a little inside.
Posted by: Katie at April 19, 2006 11:47 PMMaybe I'm old-school, but if V****a Monologues was good for nothing else, it showed just how much this word means to women - how political it is for a woman. Men have used and abused women for generations and women have every right to vindicate this word and their authority over its usage. You, Mendon, however, do not. This word is extremely sensitive because of how much it means to a woman - and how much it may have, in reality, been abused by men.
I recognize that in an appropriate context it should be used. But, Mendon, please choose wisely. The indignation is a bit over the top on your part - for me as a woman.
Posted by: Mara at April 20, 2006 1:45 AMI agree that no one should be banned from saying V****a- however just because some women have 'reclaimed' c**t and p***y does not mean that men can say them. It is comparable to a white person using the 'reclaimed' word nigger.
I read a book that was written in both English and Spanish (aimed for a bilungual audience) where the main character called her v****a her cosita. Cosa is feminine thing so Cosita is of course a little thing. I like that a lot.
My main comment is this- you think GRAVITY is putting pressure on the v****a?
Posted by: Rae at April 20, 2006 5:34 PM